I'm in ur book, doctoring ur proze.

The doctor is IN.

Specifically, Dr. Scarlett. I know, I know, I rave about her on this blog more often than not, but that praise is well-earned.

On today's episode of "Book ER", she was faced with helping me revamp the beginning of Nine Tenths of the Law. Now, I do edit as I write, but that's usually just some minor prose tweakery. I usually save stuff like this until the first draft is done. In this case, though, it was bothering me to the point of distraction.

It all began a few weeks back when I'd given chapter 1 to my trusty first draft beta readers, Scarlett and Adam. At that point, Adam expressed some concerns about the beginning. The chapter was a bit slow to start. Though the reader was hooked by the end of the chapter, the first few pages were a bit "meh".

Now, when it comes to publishing, nothing says "kiss of death" like "slow to get started". The first paragraph had better grab the reader by the short n curlies and not let go until the end of the last page. So, naturally, it was of great concern to me that Nine Tenths of the Law didn't commence short n curly grabbing until a few pages in.

So I consulted with Scarlett, the Great and Powerful Book Doctor. Being the benevolent soul that she is, she took some time away from Plus One (have I mentioned how much I love that book, by the way? Because I seriously do.) to have a go at my first chapter. After a few minutes of tweaking and fiddling, she zapped it back to me across the intertubes.

And...

...RESULT!

Short n curlies grabbed by the second SENTENCE. It required some use of flashbacks, but was expertly done - as one would expect when Scarlett is involved - and...well...it fucking worked.

Sweet.

Now I feel better about finishing the book itself, because the beginning and ending are up to snuff. In fact, now I feel a bit obligated to finish the book because Scarlett has inflicted her genius upon it, and I would be remiss (read: summarily executed) if I trunked it now. No pressure.

In all seriousness, I sing the praises of my beta readers and book doctor because they are so, so, soooooo valuable. Adam and Scarlett are both more then willing to let me know, in no uncertain terms, if something in the book is made of fail. Adam called me out on something with The Best Man that resulted in an additional chapter near the end, one that I think helped the story tremendously. Scarlett has ripped countless chapters, scenes, even entire plots, to shreds and watched in smug satisfaction as something better rose from the ashes. Yeah, sometimes it stings, but a thick skin is required in this business. Darlings must be killed, shit must be removed, and it must be done without apology. So, I owe you two big time.

The fact that I have a beta reader and book doctor rolled into one is even better. Not only does she have no qualms about telling me "this blows...sort it, shithead", but she is more than willing to roll up her sleeves, whip out some tools of butchery, and slaughter my failing prose into submission.

I can't emphasize enough, my loyal blog minions, the importance of having brutally honest beta readers. Writing is, to an extent, a solitary occupation, but nothing has benefitted me more as a writer than obtaining a harem of trigger-happy beta readers and a writing partner that is worth her weight - hell, my weight - in gold. Find someone like this, my friends. And when you do, hold onto them. Keep them chained in the basement. Whatever it takes, do not let them get away.

Fortunately, I don't have to keep my writing partner chained in my basement.

I just keep her well-supplied with mancandy photos, and she stays around.

Speaking of which...this should keep her around for a while:
Little of this for good measure...
Hell, who am I kidding? This one's for my own enjoyment..
And, while I'm at it, this one's for Vanessa, who's been demanding that I post some eyecandy for her. Since she has been one of my loyal blog minions from the get-go, I shall happily oblige:
Thanks again to my loyal beta readers and Dr. Scarlett, The Book Doctor. Y'all rock.